Builds & Bugs: Which RPG class are you as a developer?

Question 1: At the dawn of your hard workday, what do you open first?

IDE. My code is calling

My energy drink. Strength before strategy

YouTube. One video. No witnesses

Team's chat. Maybe my coworkers are discussing something important, and my voice is needed

My TODO list

The task tracker... to keep an eye on the team's progress

Creating brand-new features

Resolved ones

High-reward tasks

Designing architecture

Writing documentation

Tasks that boost my visibility

Analyze and refactor the most vicious parts

RUN IT IMMEDIATELY!1!

Close it. I have a more worthwhile task waiting

Study the wisdom left by those who came before (old code comments)

Summon the vets in a group chat and ask what on earth this thing does

Call upon the Powers of Holy Matrix Multiplication

To me? Code? Review? Huh???

A basic test of skills, standard practice

A chance for someone else to finish my work

A stage to shine with my expertise

Guiding others along the right path

Time to chill with my fav coworkers

Assess their potential

Take them under your wing and train. First a squire, then a knight

Invite them for a break to uncover their true nature

Show them how true masters work

Break bread with them

Watch silently. The weaklings will get weeded out...

It just works

It follows the project architecture and is thoroughly tested

Truly robust code? It was never written

It complies with DDD, SOLID, KISS, OOP… but let's be honest, few will truly grasp the elegance

It meets requirements and honors established standards

It works flawlessly and shines under heavy load (worthy of a ballad!)

Tools

Myself

Fortune

Knowledge

Docs

Teammates

Shout to gather everyone

Reject it. I'll accept only a hyper-protein, low-carb, healthful offering

Claim my rightful share

FOOOOD! AT LAST!!!

I ordered it (on the company's tab)

I'll ensure everyone gets their slice (no more than one)

*Press F*

There are two prods. One is down, the other one is down too

"Guys, late-night alert…"

Better safe than sorry—I'll fix it in the morning

They're lucky. I don't sleep at night…

I'll handle it, let the team sleep peacefully

I'll ask party members for help. We'll tackle this together

They never learn. Such a pity

Hotfix it in prod. NOW!

I'll study it and only then deploy a perfect fix (now the prod's been down for 3 days)

Found a bug? Create an issue

Remove the faulty line and get kudos for the hotfix (the code was mine)

No comments

// In this comment, I, as a dev with some skepticism accumulated // over years of watching comments turn into lies and become outdated, // feel compelled to say the following: This comment exists because // the code below looks wrong, but it isn't (see lines 42–58). // I'm writing this not out of love for documentation, but out of respect // for whoever reads this 6 months from now (likely me, in mild despair). // I explain why the code is like this, not what it does.

Ironical

Clean, structured, and aligned with the code style

None needed, my code is already a self-explicable masterpiece

I comment where my colleagues didn't

Victory! Another one! Next!

My watch will never end. Time to write (scrolls) TODOs for the next release

Drop a hint: a good work deserves a good reward… *toss a coin to your worker*

What's done is done. It ain't much but it's honest work

Celebrate it. I'll throw a party for the team

Noted, but we need to reinforce our powers for the next release

Builds & Bugs: Which RPG class are you as a developer?

Question 1: At the dawn of your hard workday, what do you open first?

Question 2: What tasks do you favor most?

Question 3: You open a dusty legacy project. None have touched it for ages, but the creepy note, "No way! Pure evil and sadism" piques curiosity. What do you do?

Question 4: What does a code review mean to you?

Question 5: Junior developers join your team. Your reaction?

Question 6: What does it mean for code to be "robust"?

Question 7: What do you rely on most?

Question 8: You landed on a Pizza Day in your office. What do you do?

Question 9: The prod is down in the dead of night. Your actions?

Question 10: You encounter a serious bug. What's your move?

Question 11: What do your code comments usually look like?

Question 12: The release is complete. Victory! Your reaction?

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